Free Falling

I was eighteen when Free Fall was a new ride at Magic Mountain and I remember well my first ride on it; that instant where your breath catches at the initial drop and you feel like you’re suspended in air. That to me was what letting go of everything and trusting God felt like.

I’m not submissive by nature…not many of us are, but a lot of us have a little too much self-will for our own good. And that would be me. I used to think, “Poor God, it’s like the taming of the shrew when He has to deal with me.” Then I thought, “Poor me.” Because to bend my unyielding will I had to endure a lot of unpleasant will benders. It would be nice just to be able to raise your hands and say, “I surrender,” but it so goes against the grain.

Rebellion can be blamed for the resistance, but for a lot of people it’s more of a control thing, a means of self-protection. It’s a scary place to be to let everything go and take your hands off the wheel. It doesn’t feel safe. Especially for those, who from past experiences have been conditioned not to trust. But if we want more from our lives, from ourselves, we have to get a little adventurous and step out of the safety zone.

Just like Free Fall that state of breathlessness might freak you out and almost feel unnatural at first. But if you can bring yourself to ride it out and surrender all (to God) it’s the most freeing thing you can do.

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